Saturday, October 22, 2011

October 22nd, 2011

I understand I am not always THE most patient person in the world, or the most mature. And I may listen to drama on occassion or even ask for it, in small snippets, if it means getting to know how someone is that I care about and cannot get ahold of for whatever reason. In such cases, as they are rare, I don't mind drama. I have to sort through it all to get to what actually happened, but that's fine, you know? As long as I can get to the TRUTH, it's fine.
And as far as my maturity goes, yeah, I act a little immature a lot of the time. But that's mostly my visage, fasade if you will. Most people won't feel comfortable around someone who acts like every last action and word is the hinge for which all doom is to fall upon. So, I act like I just don't care. That's not to say I don't in reality, or that my mind isn't reeling from the thousands of hinges I'm staring at, but I pretend I don't. I hold it in. To myself. For me alone to wallow in when I have moments alone.

What I don't understand, is how someone who has such difficulty being kind, or at least... oh, what's the world I'm looking for right now... Polite, can say they've "taken in" 4 children when they "didn't have to", as a way to try and make their mother sound innocent for hitting a child. I'm sorry, but abuse is abuse, and it doesn't have to be recurring to be labeled as such. And threatening to kick a child out of house and home isn't just abuse, it's neglect. Now, tell me again how you're such a saint? About those kids you've taken in? 
It's my opinion at least, if you "take in" children, you should be kind to them. Understanding. Patient. If you're aware of mental difficulties they have, such as anger, why provoke them? How is hitting them going to teach them ANYthing? Especially if you're hitting them to tell them hitting is bad?
It just doesn't make sense to me.
It's one more reason I just can't wait to have kids, and I don't udnerstand why fate is making me wait. I've earned my patience, I know what to do, I have kids out the wazoo saying they wish I could take care of them, or adopt them, and I've magically gotten foster parenting information in the mail. So, how are these hideously rude, immature and incomprehensibley non-parental-material people keep getting the gift of parenthood.
I'm ready, I'm able, I'm much more qualified.
So why?

Life lessons in this one:
- Hitting a child is wrong, particularly when you're trying to teach them that hitting is wrong.
- Drama has no place in life, or child-rearing. It just teaches them that lies and drama give them attention, and so they'll continue that hunt. Even if it means hurting other people in the end.
- A little Humility goes a long, long way.

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